A Writer's Realization: I'll Never Be Trusted

I'll never be trusted
I deviated from this path once
I was a dunce
Eating soybeans
And eating "clean"
Also, exposing a probable coon gene
I know that I'm not dark
So does everyone else
Despite my soul
Maybe it is my soul and not my shade
I still, always... lament what I can't perceive
What I will never know
Is the loss that other's see
I'm delusional
I'm just talking to myself